Hey there, it’s been a while. And I don’t know about you, but the last two plus years have been pretty damned depressing. Yes, even for a woman living in “relative” freedom on the beach in Baja, Mexico. What it comes down to is I feel like I’m wasting my life by not following what I believe to be my purpose. I have a strong calling to write, but the desire for financial security keeps getting in the way. The last time I felt this conflicted, I was still in Canada doing the marital should-I-stay-or-should-I-go mamba.
And then *THE PANDEMIC* raised it’s ugly, spike-protein encrusted head and made self-expression daunting. While people dealt with the loss of loved ones, isolation, anxiety and fear, lockdowns, loss of businesses and jobs, I reasoned they probably didn’t want to hear from some woman living on the beach in Mexico. And as I kept my head down, the world transformed into a meaner, more divided place than I ever imagined possible.
Fear is a poor motivator.
And the world is still fucked up. So, what brought me back here? Short answer – dengue fever. Long answer, the rest of this blog.
Dengue hit me last Wednesday night and made me slow way down. I unplugged for a change, let texts and emails go unanswered. I focused on taking care of myself – staying hydrated, close to the bathroom, and sleeping. I listened to some podcasts. I rested because I didn’t have a choice. If I didn’t, I knew I would get sicker. I surrendered.
And I think that act of surrender delivered dividends.
Last night, I felt surprisingly energetic and took the dog for a short walk on the beach for the first time in days. I watched in delight as the sky turned every shade of pink and lavender and hoped my feeling of wellness wasn’t some kind of dengue ninja trick.
Before bed, I decided to do a meditation on the “Insight Timer” app. Twenty three minutes later, I got up from where I’d lain beneath the stars and began to prepare for bed. It occurred to me that I felt even better, better than I have in months, and wondered if the meditation I’d chosen called “Deep Healing” hadn’t delivered in spades. Wow, I thought, I’m gonna do that meditation again.
But then I couldn’t fall sleep. I tossed and turned for hours. Curiously though, the experience was not unpleasant. My mind travelled to interesting places and pulled up ancient memories and images that shot through my brain with clarity.
It was a peculiar feeling.
This morning, I awoke feeling the effects of not getting enough sleep and was no longer convinced, as I had been the night before, that I’d be able to surf. I decided a repeat performance of the “Deep Healing” meditation was in order. Maybe I’d get another surge of energy. And it was good. Very good. But I still didn’t feel up to the demands of surfing. So I decided to revisit a metaphysical mashup version of Rich Roll’s podcast that I’d listened to on the way home on Wednesday. There was gold in the interviews with Tommy Rivers Puzey, and Raghunath Cappo that I wanted to write down.
Tommy, better known as Tommy Rivs, is “the poet of endurance and philosopher of the human spirit” according to Rich Roll. He is more specifically a highly credentialed ultramarathoner who in the summer of 2020, had a near-death experience while in a lung cancer-induced coma.
According to Tommy our experience in the afterlife will be all about how much love we share. AND, our happiness in this existence is proportional to our consciously choosing love when we are presented with a choice of actions.
From the horse’s mouth (note the bracketed parts are added by me for clarity):
“Heaven and hell exist, but they exist…in proportion to the amount of love we gave and the amount of love we were able to receive. Hell is the recollection and the understanding of all of the love we didn’t give and didn’t receive when we could have. …Heaven and hell exist simultaneously…and what we continue to feel [in the after-life]…is directly linked with the way we interact with people [in the here and now]. … Happiness is not in future, it’s right now. It’s all happening this very moment. Heaven and hell are all happening all of the time to all of us…whether or not we experience that joy, that happiness, is based on our ability to see it as it’s happening rather than in retrospect…to have joy…is 100% based on our capacity to see it as it’s happening.”
And WHAMMO, it was like I’d been hit over the head with a cosmic frying pan. By golly, the Beatles were right!
Love really is the answer.
How we choose to respond in every moment, with love or otherwise, determines the amount of joy we will experience in this life and the quality of our experience in the afterlife.
I imagine to some of you this is a mere platitude. We’ve all heard it a million, if not a kajillion times. But you know how sometimes you hear something as though for the first time and it registers in your brain like a big piece of life’s puzzle has slipped into place? Well, this was one of those times. Only, not only did Tommy Rivs give me a whopping piece of the puzzle, in the very next segment Swami Raghunatha handed me the last six pieces.
So, what does Swami Raghu say we need to do to live a life where the balance sheet is heavily in favor of love and thereby find happiness? Here’s a list of six steps, technically called the Six Pillars of Bhakti, to living a happy life.
Six Steps to a Happy Life
1. Stop criticizing other people. “The sound coming out of your mouth can be toxic.”
2. Be tolerant. “Stop blaming the world [i.e. everyone in it] for your unhappiness.”
3. Take no offence. “Nothing’s happening to me…it’s happening for me. There is a benevolent energy lifting us higher and higher and higher. And…everything is for my edification.”
4. See the good in others and let them know it. “Instead of finding what this person’s doing so wrong, what are they doing right?…otherwise we’re going to lock in and foster hate with “others” and we’re going to have no commonalities.” Then tell them what you appreciate about them.
5. Be quick to apologize. “If you think you may have hurt someone’s feelings…you apologize first.”
6. Maintain a gratitude practice. “[The alternative is] to have a “this-is-unfair practice”, or entitlement practice. It’s simple math, entitlement makes you sad, gratitude makes you happy.”
These are going on the fridge, in my phone, in my Big Book of Big Ideas, and anywhere else I can think of. I might get them tattoo’d on my forearms. Oh and, to get back to feeling conflicted about where I’m putting my energy – I’m pretty sure my money-chasing days are numbered.
PS You can hear the relevant Rich Roll podcast here
PPS Tommy Rivs knows he isn’t the first person who’s come back from the edge with this wisdom and shared his story incredibly humbly.
PPPS – The list above is actually called “The Six Pillars of Bhakti”
PPPS – I’ll get back to you here and let you know how this new approach to life unfolds.
PPPPS – Please do share your feelings about this post. The whole point of doing this is share with others in the hopes that you will join me on this cosmic ride towards a hopefully pleasant end to a meaningful and happy life. Also, in the absence of feedback or dialogue, the writing gig can feel an awful lot like yelling into a deserted canyon.
Dawn Revealed 